What Is It Like To Be Led By You?

According to engineering, the depth of a deep foundation depends on how tall the building is.

well, Leadership is a towering business.

Being in a leadership position means being in the spotlight where everyone looks up at you or just looks at you.

The significant question that will always serve as your true north is; Why do you lead? Your why may jeopardize the desired outcome in the first place.

When you are at the top, it is easy to forget what it’s like not being at the top. It is easy to place the focus on yourself. It is easy to get your priorities mixed up. Because it is very easy for pride to get in the way.

It is so easy to begin using your authority to serve yourself and get comfortable. We are human beings. Naturally, we are selfish. We think of ourselves first and we put ourselves first.

When you are a leader, with the pure intention to serve, you will need to stop and always cross-check your motives constantly. Why are you doing that? Does it serve the people you are leading?

For leaders to become truly great and make a lasting impact, they’ve got to work immensely on their character.

Character is the foundation of effective leadership.

Character is who you are when no one is looking. Character is your true self.

And one thing is certain: the higher you go, the more your character will be exposed. Because you might think you are hiding your flaws very well but not when you are very high on top. The crown will always expose you.

I have met so many leaders who at a distance, seem like superheroes and they are loved and praised by so many people. But the people that truly work for them have tales to tell and you will be shocked.

I have met leaders who believe that they are and should be the answer to every problem. There are leaders who believe no one else is as smart or as better as they are. It is unfortunate that there are leaders who are lazy, they never put in the work but rather push their subordinates to think and do all the work. I have met leaders who were too comfortable to push themselves to grow, always reluctant and just satisfied with the status quo. I have met leaders who are always fishing for praise, they would want all the glory and all the attention. I have met leaders who speak badly about people, their tounges are full of malice and destruction. I have met leaders who are disorganized and hypocrites. I have met leaders who confuse their followers by coming up with random ideas every day, these leaders struggle to articulate the vision and communicate it with the followers. I have met leaders who do all the work and get burned out by believing that they have the wrong people with them.

I am not saying that leaders are not allowed to have weaknesses. But I am saying, some of these weaknesses sabotage the growth of followers, the organization, and the leader himself. I am saying some of these weaknesses are an issue of character change.

It is so difficult to change the character of a person. I don’t think any amount of consultancy will help.

Especially an adult person who is in a position of power.

It is most difficult to change a person who doesn’t see a problem in their character.

A lot of organizations will never grow to their true potential because of the leaders that they have. Their colleagues feel powerless to do anything because they have tried everything.

These leaders believe that they did it before, that’s how they got where there are and they will get anywhere they want to be. They are great, right?

Wrong!

It is dangerous to add speed when you are heading in the wrong direction.

But how do you know you are in the wrong direction?

Today, with all my heart, I want to speak to leaders. (Don’t say this is not for me, I am a great leader) You might be shocked. Here are my few cents that will help you Identify what it is like to be on the other side of the table with your followers.

1. What happens when problems arise? Do people take a step back and wait for you to come up with the solution? Does the problem feel like it’s yours alone or it is everyone’s challenge? Does the team constantly bring up solutions to you? Do you think everyone else stays up at night as much as you do? I understand that this also has a lot to do with the nature of your team, however, if your people believe in you, believe in the vision, and have high respect for who you are and what you’ve done for them— They will do anything to get the trouble out of the way once it arises. It is not a good sign when everyone on the team is self-serving and focused on their own agenda.
2. If you immerse yourself deeply in work (Focused on KPIs, getting the deals done, etc) and barely focus your attention on the people you are leading, there is a high chance you are heading to a dead end. What do I mean by this? Do you know your team? Really? Do you understand what dreams and aspirations they have? Do you see their effort when they do something extraordinary? Do you invest your time in them? Do you intentionally seek to inspire them and get the best out of them? Are you emotionally invested in their growth as much as you are emotionally invested in the revenue increase of your organization? People are naturally inclined to go over the cliff for leaders who sincerely care for them. It is easy for people to sense if you are exploiting them or if you genuinely care for their growth and want nothing but the best. When you do this, a lot of pressure will get off you, because the majority of the work will be handled by your team. When a team is growing (In which you are the engineer to this) the business will grow explosively.
3. If people are mostly quiet during meetings, there might be a sign that you are dominating the discussions. As human beings, we are naturally blindsided. And because of this, leaders should work extremely hard to get as much feedback as possible. We live in an era where innovation and creativity are much needed, the competition is stiff. Now, if you are in a meeting, with over 10 people (Millenials and Gen Z included) and all they do is just listen to you talk- You are dead wrong about what leadership means. Workplaces are designed to let people be themselves. The more comfortable and expressive they are, the more ideas and creativity flow in. This is a hard puzzle to crack, but with practice, you could make it a goal to shut up in every meeting and let people rise to the occasion. How you show up sets the tone for how your people show up. Be intentional, ask them to share ideas, not just out of the blue, but rather ask them to come prepared with a list of ideas. Encourage them to do the talking and just choose to be the last to speak.
4. This may come out as shocking, but is your phone more important than your team? I have met leaders who when they are interviewed on camera, give all their attention. But when it’s just two people having a conversation, they barely give them their attention. They would always be a call, a message, a tweet to reply to, or a video to like. That is rude. Do you give your team the attention they deserve? Do they feel heard when they talk to you? Do you fill those meetings with the wise fancy words you just learned from a book last week? Take time to listen. Sometimes when you are in a meeting, you would talk and talk and talk, once it is finally someone else who is talking, you pull up your phone and begin scrolling. That is a clear sign that something is not right and you need to fix that.

Be bigger on the Inside than you are on the outside.

A lot of leaders are bigger on the outside. They seem great and awesome and they are just everything you would dream of. But once you get to know them personally, you get disappointed. Do you remember the quote; Don’t meet your heroes? “It is unwise to seek personal acquaintance with people whom one has regarded with high esteem, as they often fail to fulfill one’s expectations, resulting in disappointment”

I challenge you to be the type of leader that your closest people (Family, friends, colleagues), speak very highly of you. The people closest to you have a deep sense of respect for you because they really know who you are and they admire it deeply.

But this is not easy as it looks. Very few people have mastered this.

It is an issue of self-discipline. To always do the right thing despite how difficult it is. It is an issue of having a teachable spirit. Where you are open and willing to learn. Willing to accept that you too cannot be perfect. It takes courage to admit this.

It is a natural principle, just like the law of gravity,

Once you have managed to lead yourself exceptionally well, you earn the right to lead others.

I don’t know about you, but I am the most difficult person to lead.

I push myself every day to be better. To have a better mindset. To have a better heart. To better serve people. To listen more. Never rely on assumptions. To read and learn more. To expect the best in people. To love God. To manage my time better. To be ‘myself’ more — With Skill.

Here is a powerful piece by John Maxwell that helps me stay in check

“As I grow older, I would like to be known as:

Available rather — than a hard worker

Compassionate — more than competent

Content — not driven

Generous — Instead of rich

Gentle — over being powerful

Listener — More than a great communicator

Loving — Versus quick or bright

Reliable — Not Famous

Sacrificial — Instead of successful

Self-controlled — rather than exciting

Thoughtful — more than gifted

I want to be a foot washer”

Organizations exist to serve. Leaders exist to serve. If you understand this, being led by you, will always be a life-changing experience for your followers.

Until next time,

A fellow servant.